I have to say that it still boggles my mind when a gay guy refuses to bottom his entire life. Sometimes in life you need to broaden your horizons-there are more flavors in the bucket than vanilla.
It’s hard for me to take anyone seriously when they claim that bottoming is “awful” or “painful” or “not my thing” when they’ve: a) never tried it, or b) only felt the tip and gave up completely after that. That would be like someone saying they hate chocolate when they’ve only smelled and tasted, but never swallowed.
When I came out of the closet, I came out a bottom honey. I happened to have a keen interest right from the get go. Not all guys are going to be like me and that’s fine. I’ve even accepted the fact that not all men’s bodies are built to bottom, but at least they’ll try.
Young gay guys who’ve never bottomed associate it as something feminine or emasculating. When you’re 20, you’re cocky and overdosing on youth and beauty; you want to hold onto as much as you can for as long as you can hold it, so it’s quite easy to say you’re never going to bottom. At this age you probably will find a lot of eager bottoms to please you anyway, but when is the “ah-ha” moment?
In order to bottom, do you need to meet a man you’re willing to give it up to?
Does it require an innate interest?
Do you have to force yourself to acquire a liking for it?
When is the moment a self-labeled “total top” chooses to experiment? The fact that we as gay men have a choice in the matter (top vs. bottom) can limit our experience if we let it.
If you don’t want to bottom or top, chances are, you don’t have to. That’s the truth! There is always going to be a man willing to meet you there. In other words you have to want to bottom in order to truly experience it, much less, enjoy it.
I lost my virginity at 18, but I lost my gay virginity at 20. I slept with girls, and I also fell into the trap of preserving my masculinity (or whatever) by clinging to the role of “top.”
I had sex with girls for two years, so the idea of being submissive seemed to emasculate a well-preserved image I placed upon myself. But little by little, as I came into accepting who I was, I quickly learned that masculinity is only fear biding its time.
I was no longer afraid of being true to form. I was okay with being gay, which enlightened everything about gay sex. Anal sex isn’t a “feminine” thing to do-it’s simply another sexual act. It’s not a role you become as much as it is a preference you simply enjoy.
So enough with the anti-bottoming rhetoric. We’ve all claimed to be total-something when we were younger, so as for you 19-year old twinky babies that believe bottoming is a sissy thing to do, talk to me in five years. You might change your tune.
Source: gayguys
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