Netherlands Antilles (Curacao) is a small Caribbean island that is an independent country. It is not hard to quickly discern the attitude here toward LGBT people–at least to tourists to whom the welcome sign reads: “Welcome. “Live and Let Live” or “Biba i laga Biba”. But homophobia is an undercurrent here as well and natives do not come flying out of the closet.

Geography is Not Simple

First, get the Antilles Islands sorted out in your mind; it’s not easy. Overall, the Caribbean Antilles (antilles is an ancient word meaning islands) are divided into two major groups: the larger “Greater Antilles” to the north and west, includes Cuba, Jamaica, Haiti, the Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico. Then there are smaller “Lesser Antilles” in the southeast Caribbean. The Lesser Antilles are broken down into two other groups of islands: the Leeward Antilles, close to Venezuela, and the Windward Antilles northeast of Venezuela. (Click on the map to enlarge) What’s also confusing is another group of ‘Leeward Islands’, northeast and separate from the Leeward Antilles.

In this mix of dozens of island-states (all part of a huge archipelago chain of islands stretching from Venezuela to Florida) there are six islands that are within the influence of Netherlands (Holland), in a sort of ‘commonwealth’ association. Some are independent states now and some have the status of Dutch municipalities.

These six are divided into two groups: Leeward (Netherlands) Antilles: Aruba, Boniare and Curacao. The other group is called the Windward (Netherlands) Antilles of Sint Maarten, Saba, and Sint Eustatius. The distance from Aruba in the south to Sint Maartin in the north is about 597 miles (960.57 kilometers); they are far apart and tourists do not usually go to both on one trip.

The Island Country of Netherlands Antilles (Curacao)


Netherlands Antilles (Curacao) is a small Caribbean island that became an independent country within the Kingdom of the Netherlands on October 2010. See this brief overview of Curacao. Here it’s not hard to quickly discern the attitude here toward LGBT people. 

This in-depth website serves as a resource for LGBT travelers looking for help in navigating the land and life of the island and finding where to stay and what to do and see. “We are committed to welcoming all visitors to the island and hope that this new site will help spread the word to the gay and lesbian community worldwide. Gaycuracao.com highlights the many tourism partners on island that are members of the International Gay & Lesbian Travel Association and provides a listing of places to gather and meet other gay travelers, as well as locals.” With 17 proud members, Curaçao is proud to have the largest IGLTA membership in all of the Caribbean.

“It is important to us that it’s known to the gay & lesbian community that everyone is welcome in Curaçao. Our island offers diverse culture, art galleries, beaches, museums, fine accommodations and exquisite cuisine that are enjoyed by all visitors to the island,” commented André Rojer of CHATA (Curacao Hospitality and Tourism Association), who has labored tirelessly to coordinate the gay-friendly efforts of the tourist industry in Curacao.

First Gay Center in Curacao

In a unusual Caribbean first, Curaçao opened a gay centre in 2010.. With its activities Casa Rosada (pink house), located in the neighborhood of Otrabanda, hopes to break the taboo on homosexuality.

Education and information are badly needed, says FOKO (Fundashon Orugyo Korsou) the Caribbean island’s gay group. Founder Thirza Stewart stresses how important that is: “The silence that falls when you tell your mother you are gay is very hard.”

The guests attending the opening received a glass of pink champagne. Said one happy but realistic lesbian guest, “why should I apologize if I like women? It’s hard to be open about my sexual preference. The consequences here in Curcao can be quite painful–unlike what the tourist office says. Certain people are no longer welcome at home.”

According to FOKO neither Curacao Society in general, nor its politicians in particular “are sufficiently conscious of the fact that gay rights in the Dutch Kingdom in Europe are based on equality and anti-discrimination principles that are enshrined in the constitution of Curacao… recently derogatory remarks have been made about homosexuality and same-sex relationships…”

Being Family and Being Gay

Gay and lesbian people, Thirza Stewart says, not only face prejudice at home but also on the work floor. She knows several people who were refused a job for being gay. Foko head Mario Kleinmoedig confirms gay people on Curaçao face an uphill battle, though things are not as bad as in Jamaica, where they fear for their lives.

Kleinmoedig stresses how difficult it is to have open gay relationships given all the social pressure. He says it is important to lower that pressure but also to teach gay people how to cope with it. “We want to raise the self-esteem of gay people. Homosexuality simply exists—that is a discussion we are no longer interested in. That’s history.”

Someone who lives close to Casa Rosada said he is worried by the opening of the gay centre. “Further down is a brothel, and over there is a hotel where people rent rooms for a few hours. There are many taboos here. At the same time, a lot of down-low activity happens, especially at night. I hope this gay center does not add to that.”

Gay Marriage
Same-sex marriages are not performed in Aruba, Curaçao or Sint Maarten, the major islands of the Netherlands Caribbean commonwealth. Many of the residents of the islands are Roman Catholic and Christian Protestant so the issue of same-sex marriage is highly opposed. However after several court rulings in Holland and locally, the islands were forced to recognize any marriage (including same-sex marriages) registered anywhere in the Netherlands Kingdom. Since marriage in Holland is open to people of any gender, marriages registered there have to be accepted in the islands.

However, non-equal treatment of married couples is allowed in the Antilles. In 2009, the Common Court of Justice of the Netherlands Antilles and Aruba ruled in an appeal case that a the partner in a same-sex marriage does not have to be offered health care benefits in a government employees health care scheme. The court ruled that regulations can exist which are based on the opposite-sex marriage definition existing in the Netherlands Antilles.

Another court ruled in a case of enrollment of a homosexual partner in a collective health insurance scheme, stating explicitly that if enrollment was only possible for male-female married or unmarried straight couples, thus excluding same-sex couples, this would constitute discrimination. But if non-married couples had been excluded, there would be no obligation for enrollment of same-sex marriage. So the rulings are not settled yet.

The Social Scene

“The gay and lesbian community is quite large,” explains Madame Jeanette Pepper, of Curacao GayPlasa Foundation, organizers of Curacao’s annual Gay Pride event. “They are not all out, but they occupy positions throughout all layers of the community,” says Pepper,.

As for venues, these constantly changes, so a visitor will need to check local listings upon arrival. Here are some from the Internet but there is no assurance they are still open. “The G-Lounge, Williwood, Wet & Wild and Tutu Tango, where every second Saturday of the month is a party by Curaçao GayPlasa. Gay couples also frequent the so-called straight clubs, as all of the beach bars and nightclubs on the island have such a relaxed and gay friendly attitude. So, places like Papagayo, St.Tropez, Mambo, Bermuda, Pampus, Mundo Bizarro, Omundo and De Heeren are all very gay friendly as well,” says Pepper, from GayPlasa, who also organize routine gay events throughout the year.

There is also a Mr Gay Curacao contest each year to select a candidate for the Mr Gay World Contest held at different places around the globe.

Carnival and ‘Get Wet’ Weekend

The big event of the year is the Curaçao Carnival, which begins on New Year’s Day with various festivities extending until the day before Ash Wednesday. A highlight is the Festival di Tumba during the second week in February, when local musicians vie for prizes. Throughout the whole season there are outdoor street dances, concerts and parades.

As well, Curaçao is also that rare Caribbean isle with a bonafide gay event — the ‘Get Wet Weekend’ in September, with movies, pool parties and boat trips and much cruising and revelry. The weekend is considered Curacao’s major Gay Pride event.

Christmas time is yet another period where there is almost always lots of parties and activities. Said one local, “Scream when you see carnival group T’aki Tin in the parades, which has the highest concentration of LGBT participants.

Meeting Gays in Curacao 

Once commentator wrote that he could find more ‘dates’ from homophobic Jamaica than he could from Curacao. He attributed this to an ironic situation. Although begin gay in Curacao is safer than Jamaica, in general, many closeted and married men can easily check out Adam4Adam, a hook-up site popular in the Caribbean. However, in doing so they might recognize the faces of other profilers and fear being outed if they responded. “But in Jamaica, the homophobic Rastafarians and the equally homophobic God-fearing Evangelicals would not even know what Adam4Adam was. The gay profilers in Jamaica probably feel safer to give their stats and show their face pics than those in Curacao.” 

Unlike so many other islands in the Caribbean, Curacao is rather safe all over. The natives are friendly for the most part–too friendly for those on the down-low. The same commentator also felt that Curacao gay life was too age-oriented with the few bars there catering to specific ages. “Mixing was all but impossible,” he wrote. 

Another blogger posted his opinion: “The Caribbean can be chilly when it comes to welcoming gays, wrote one Canadian. On the three Antilles I visited, local activists tried to convey the importance of discretion, a sort of “don’t ask, don’t tell” that was hard for me, as a Canadian, to understand.

Gay men need to have a good group of gay friends. Girls are great, we’re obsessed, but we need nights just with the dudes. I spent the first few years of my gay life without any gay friends and it was a sad terrible thing. Now that I’ve accumulated a good group of gays in New York, I feel like I’ve reached complete social fulfillment. And who knows? If your gay friends are cute, maybe you can make out with them sometimes! (J/K, not J/K, stop, don’t stop!) But on the real, I’ve hooked up with some of my gay friends and I’ve been stunned by how little of a thing it is. I thought that I, Mr. I Majored In Having Lots of Feelings, would freak out but nope! It’s actually super fun. Granted, there are some friends you should Never smooch so please kiss with caution.

So in this age of mainstreaming, where gay men come out of the closet not to attend dinner parties of catty queens like themselves and the cast of Boys in the Band but to a room of welcoming members of society both straight and gay, how can we form a culture of our own? If there are a million ways to be gay, can we settle on a few key experiences every gay man should experience to draw them together?

Here are my suggestions:


1. Do Be Funny

Gay men need to be funny. And no, calling someone’s pashmina scarf ugly is not funny. It’s just bitchy. You see, funny people have usually dealt with some dark stuff in their lives and laughing about it is the only way to ensure that they won’t go insane. Even though I’ve lived a relatively easy life in terms of my homosexuality, it still can get pretty hard. Hence laughter! Plus, gay men love anything campy, which is the best kind of humor in my opinion. Having an appreciation for Best in Show,Popular, and Showgirls indicates that you’re more evolved than the average human. It should also be noted that the gays and the Jews run everything that’s creative.

2. Cruise

Everyone used to know to glance over your shoulder after three steps if you were interested in that sexy stranger on the sidewalk. There was a complex network of looks and signals that men used to use to attract each other, something that made gay men much more attuned to body language and perceptive than our straight counterparts. Learn how to do that. Not only will it improve your gay experience, but the way you interact with everyone. Street cruising is mostly dead – no, it can't be done on Grindr – but a trip to a bath house will teach you all you ever need to know.

3. Dress in drag

Even if it's just once for Halloween, go out in the world wearing the clothing of the opposite gender. It will it unleash a personality you didn't even know you had in you and it will make you OK with femininity. So many gay men are afraid of even the slightest bit of swish being detected. "No fems," has been branded into all of our mentality. But one night when the femme is in total control will never make you fear it again. And it will put you in touch with the brave bottle throwers who started the Stonewall Riots back in the day.

Denmark is often seen as a progressive country in regards to attitudes toward sexual orientation, a country where being openly gay isn’t psychologically and socially crippling, where one can live out one’s sexuality without the fear of being judged, and where homosexuals have nearly the same civil rights as heterosexuals. This last view, according to a March report by the Danish Institute for Human Rights, is often based on the fact that in 1989 Denmark became the first country to grant homosexuals the right to registered partnerships. Now, registered partners can also adopt stepchildren, and in 2007 the ban on lesbians’ right to artificial insemination was lifted.

Although the overall picture seems bright, homosexuals are still deprived of some of the rights and privileges enjoyed by the heterosexual majority, such as the right to a religious marriage and the right to adopt children from other countries. In addition, homosexuals face unequal treatment in other, subtler ways. Same-sex couples are structurally discriminated against when filling out the form to sign up their child at a day care institution: Assuming heterosexual parents, the form asks for the mother’s name and the father’s name, forcing one-half of the couple to assume a gender other than his or her own.

Vietnam taking the lead in gay rights in Southeast Asia by abolishing a ban on same-sex marriage has medical doctor Thuan Nguyen planning a wedding ceremony with his boyfriend of two years.
“I am ready to have a wedding,” he said. “Many, many young people in love are optimistic about the acceptance of gay weddings.”

In any country in the modern world, LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) people have hurtles to jump. Being out and open about your sexuality can be met with anything from acceptance and love, to hatred, violence, and even prison terms and execution. Every country has different dynamics and social views. In some, we can "put a ring on it" and marry the ones we love. In others, we dare not speak a word of it for fear of hatred, violence, and even prison terms and execution. The situation in America is tottering at the more positive end - every year, more people come out in support of love, and more laws pass in our favor. But bigotry stemming primarily from Christianity and other Abrahamic religions is a discomfort and even danger to many LGBT people.

Everything is ready for the wedding between Fabio and Franco, a young Italian gay couple. The announcement has been made, the guest list drawn up, the suits selected and the cake topper chosen. Yet, one important detail is missing: the location.

The possibility of celebrating in Rome, where they live, will depend on the ability of Italy’s parliament to approve a pivotal yet contentious law on same-sex civil unions.

Nearly three-quarters of Russians believe that homosexually is morally unacceptable, more than disapprove of other hot-button issues such as extramarital affairs, gambling and abortion.

The numbers come from newly released data from the Pew Research Center, which surveyed Russians on their moral attitudes in spring 2013. Russian attitudes toward homosexuality have been at the forefront given the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi. Just eight months before the games, Russia's governmental body, the Duma, passed a law making it illegal to distribute homosexual "propaganda" to minors, which includes staging gay pride events and advocating for gay rights.

The head is supported by the neck, which is made up of seven bones (vertebrae) stacked one on top of the other. The vertebrae are cushioned by discs of cartilage and bound together with ligaments. Muscles provide movement and additional support.

The neck is very mobile, as it was designed to service the eyes. Trauma, poor posture and degenerative diseases, such as arthritis, are the most common causes of neck pain. There is good evidence to show that exercise helps reduce these symptoms.

The shoulder is a ball and socket joint with a large range of movement. The shoulder joint relies heavily on the shoulder muscles for stability. Any dysfunction of these muscles or other anatomical structures, such as the collarbone, shoulder blade or joint itself, can cause pain and mobility problems.

Treatments such as physiotherapy, osteopathy or remedial massage can generally help neck and shoulder pain.

There's a lot more to the gay scene in Paris than just the Marais - so we asked the experts at The Gay Locals to come up with a list of ten things you probably didn't know about gay men in Paris.

The city’s major gay district, the Marais, is slowly turning into a boutique shopping centre with Givenchy and The Kooples next door to its many gay bars.

It’s hard not to be a bit nostalgic for the 1990s and early 2000s when the Parisian gay scene was arguably at its best. The gay community, however, has faced change before, and it’ll take more than a Prada shop to snuff out the city's gay scene – plus, who buys Prada anyway?

There’s something about Rome that can push you back into the closet. Sure, the ancients were known for a little man-on-man canoodling: One of their most celebrated emperors,Hadrian - a notorious daddy-bear type - created an entire cult around his famously beautiful companion, Antinous, who died at the tender age of 19. (Hadrian’s much-suffering wife, Sabina, can be seen scowling down in centuries-old sculptures throughout Italy, looking decidedly unsatisfied.) And in the 16th century, Tuscan-born artist Giovanni Antonio Bazzi made a name for himself while working in Baroque Rome under the nom de fresco Il Sodoma. (“Which he acquired for the obvious reasons,” a prominent Italian aristocrat once told me, her arched eyebrow audible even over the phone.)

But for a city long associated with Heralded Homosexuals of History, both purported (Michelangelo) and confirmed (Valentino), my boyfriend and I found very few visible signs of gay life during the two years we called Rome home.

A guide to Gay Berlin

Berlin will impress you, regardless of whether you’re visiting the German capital for the first time or if you’re catching up with a city that has re-invented itself after the fall of the wall in 1989. It is both modern and old, warm and cold, green and industrial, local and international. Because the city was divided in two for almost 30 years, which you will still notice today, Berlin has developed very distinctively.

With over 3.5 million inhabitants, Berlin has a rich history that dates back from the late 12th century. It has been the capital of the Kingdom of Prussia, the German Empire, the Weimar Republic, the Third Reich and is now again the capital of the re-unified Germany. Its diverse history is reflected in its architectural legacy, with representatives of almost every architectural style. Post war reconstruction and development following unification and its reinstallation as the German capital, has led to a boom in modern construction. The reconstruction of areas such as the Potsdamer Platz and the new government buildings are in strong contrast to old buildings such those seen on the boulevard Unter den Linden.

Many gay men leave the bush and head for the city, looking for love, acceptance and good times. What is life like for those who are left behind, though? Alana Valentine travelled to Broome to find out what it’s like to be a gay man in regional WA.
Ever since Jimmy Sommerville sang his plaintive falsetto anthem ‘Small Town Boy’ we’ve been familiar with gay men leaving the regional towns where they grew up and travelling to the city looking for love, liberation and an all round gay good time.

When I told a homosexual friend of mine from Sydney that I was travelling to Broome and I intended to seek out the gay community for their opinion on life in regional Australia, he could barely control his laughter. ‘I’ll be surprised if you can find anyone who will even come out to you,’ he said.

Between the popular vote to take away the marriage rights of same sex couples in California, passing of same-sex marriage bans in several states, and President elect Barack Obama including full civil unions for LGBT couples as part of this civil rights platform, there has been a lot of recent attention on same sex relationships. Opponents of marriage rights for same sex couples generally argue that it redefines marriage away from its current and "traditional" form and that children are best raised by two opposite sex parents. Advocates for allowing same sex couples the right to marry argue that marriage confers over a thousand rights that they are currently denied, like the ability to inherit property, visit a sick partner in the hospital, and provide citizenship for non-citizen spouses. See the U.S. General Accounting Office's report for the full list the 1,049 rights. Advocates also argue that children do just as well when raised by same-sex parents and that marriage provides a number of psychological and health benefits that they are currently denied.

If you’re in Australia for Mardi Gras, why not make a memorable holiday out of it by visiting some of the country’s most beautiful and queer-friendly destinations?

Sydney

The New South Wales capital has long been recognised as one of the top destinations in the world for LGBTQI travellers, and around Mardi Gras time, you’ll feel like the whole city has turned gay.

We probably don’t need to tell you that much of the party action in Sydney occurs around Oxford Street in Darlinghurst and King Street in Newtown, or that the most popular gay city beaches are at North Bondi and Tamarama. 

Instead here are some less obvious things to make your stay more memorable. If you’re looking for slightly less busy beach options, La Perouse at Little Congwong is a better place for a picnic and frolic, while Lady Jane and Obelisk beach all attract a diverse queer crowd.

Gout causes attacks of pain and swelling in one or more joints. An anti-inflammatory painkiller usually eases an attack quickly. Lifestyle factors may reduce the risk of having gout attacks. These include losing weight (if overweight), eating a healthy diet, and not drinking much alcohol or sugar-sweetened soft drinks. If gout attacks recur, then taking vitamin C supplements and/or allopurinol each day can prevent them.

What is gout and what causes it?

Gout causes attacks of painful inflammation in one or more joints. It is a type of arthritis (although it is very different to the more common rheumatoid arthritis and osteoarthritis). The pain of a gout attack can be severe.

Gout is caused by a chemical in the blood called uric acid (urate). Uric acid is usually harmless and is made in the body. Most is passed out with the urine and some from the gut with the stools (faeces). In people with gout the amount of uric acid in the blood builds up. From time to time the level may become too high and tiny grit-like crystals of uric acid may form. The crystals typically collect in a joint. The crystals irritate the tissues in the joint to cause inflammation, swelling and pain - a gout attack.

Note: some people have a high level of uric acid but do not form crystals or have gout. Also, rarely, some people with a normal level of uric acid have gout attacks. However, as a rule, the higher the level of uric acid, the greater the chance of developing gout.

For many years Scotland just did not do gay. Homosexuality was dangerous and taboo, and it was actually against the law right up to the 1980s. So how did a country that seemed to take pride in its prejudices end up with the best gay rights in Europe?

Post-war Scotland was a deeply conservative place. In fact, half the country voted Tory in 1950 and most people attended the Kirk on a Sunday. Sex was rarely, if ever, mentioned.

If talking about the birds and bees in the 1950s was taboo then mention of the possibility of bees getting together with each other was totally forbidden.

Dr Jeff Meek, the author of Queer Voices in Post-War Scotland, says: "There was almost a bar on talking about same-sex desire."

France is one of the most centralized countries in the world and Paris is the capital of all things French. Exhibiting perhaps a tiny bit of chauvinism, Parisians divide their country into two parts: Paris and "province", the provinces. It is true, at least in terms of gay life, that the rest of France tends to follow Paris's lead. But by no means should you as a gay visitor in France limit your stay to Paris, which would be like going to the USA and only seeing New York. France with a capital "F" exists outside the Paris city limits, and is a far cry from the gay cultural desert that Parisians would have you believe.

Germany lags behind many of its western counterparts when it comes to gay rights, still maintaining tighter restrictions. As the US Supreme Court considers the constitutionality of gay marriage, The Local looks at LGBT rights in Germany.

1. Gay marriage is still not legal

Same-sex couples may enter into a civil union, which entails many of the same rights as a heterosexual marriage, but many rights have been won within individual court cases rather than by top-down legislation.

This makes Germany stand out when compared to its western European allies who have passed same-sex marriage legislation, like France and the United Kingdom.

Most of Germany’s border states have also legalized gay marriage, such as the Netherlands which passed same-sex marriage legislation nearly 15 years ago, making it the first country in the world to do so.

The vertebral column (backbone) is made up of 33 vertebrae separated by spongy disks and classified into four distinct areas. The cervical area consists of seven bony parts in the neck; the thoracic spine consists of 12 bony parts in the back area; the lumbar spine consists of five bony segments in the lower back area; five sacral bones (fused into one bone, the sacrum); and four coccygeal bones (fused into one bone, the coccyx).

Between each vertebra is a fibrous disc with a jelly-like core. These cushions of cartilage allow the body to accept and dissipate load across multiple levels in the spine and still allow for the flexibility required for performing normal activities of daily living. As the body twists, bends, flexes and extends, the intervertebral discs are constantly changing their shape.

How many people in the UK are gay, lesbian or bisexual? The Office for National Statistics reckons it's 1.5% while the Kinsey report says it's 10%. Who's right?

For every 100 people in Britain, just 1 will identify themselves as gay or lesbian according to the latest government statistics. The numbers (which include gender, location and age) may come as a surprise - but why?

1.5% of the UK?

In its 'Integrated Household Survey', the Office for National Statistics asks 178,197 people about their sexual identity - and the vast majority of them choose to answer.

93.5% of people said they were 'heterosexual' or 'straight', just 1.1% said they were 'gay' or 'lesbian' and 0.4% said they were bisexual. The small fraction that was left either refused to answer or said they didn't know. Altogether, amounts to about 545,000 homosexual and 220,000 bisexual adults in the UK.

The claim that just 1.5% of people in Britain are gay, lesbian or bisexual will come as a surprise to some - even perhaps those in government. When they were analysing the financial implications of the new Civil Partnerships Act, the Treasury estimated it was 6%. Stonewall, a gay rights charity reckon that 5-7% "is a reasonable estimate".

Northern Italy offers gay travelers everything that makes medieval Italy seductive – from the art-filled towns of the Veneto to the grand old ports of Trieste and Genoa. Tuscany has always ben the most famous and glamorous of the regions of Northern Italy. The landscape of rolling hills studded with rocket pines is some of the most beautiful in Europe. Florence and Venice are the big two tourist towns - both relatively well preserved, and overcome by tourists in summer. Milan can be a lot of fun - and has a lot more in the way of gay bars, clubs and saunas for gay travellers. And up-and-coming Umbria, as beautiful as Tuscany, offers northern italian delights at a lower price.

You have a right to feel good about yourself, no matter who you are. Feeling beautiful is something that some men may be unfamiliar with. This can be especially true for gay men, who have grown up in a society that is critical of them in a variety of ways. However, beauty basically boils down to personal presentation, confidence, and personality. Learning better personal grooming, wardrobe, and lifestyle habits can help you look and feel your best, while developing your personality, passions, and self esteem will let your true inner beauty shine.

Method 1: Embracing Your Existing Beauty

1. Work on developing your self esteem. 

Gay men, in particular, may have had years of self doubt and questioning due to living with homophobia in all its forms. This takes time and effort to shake off!

- Take the time to identify what you think is beautiful about yourself, and nurture that beauty instead of doubting it.
- You should also believe other people when they tell you you are beautiful. They are telling you the truth as they see it!

2. Fight internalized homophobia. 

It can be hard to find stereotypically "gay" aspects of your composure or personality beautiful. This is because straight society has defined these things as undesirable. Instead of falling prey to these ideas, embrace your "gay voice" or mannerisms that are stereotypically associated with gay men.

3. Focus on developing your passions and skills. 

Attractiveness may have less to do with physical traits than other character traits, such as a sense of humor or a sharp intellect. Become really good at something. Do projects or hobbies you love to do. Develop a career that is fulfilling. Having passions, skills, and pursuits makes you a more interesting, and attractive, person.

4. Don't compare yourself to others. 

It can be easy to see someone and think, "I wish I could look that good." This can be especially hard in the gay community, where looks and traditional attractiveness tends to take center stage. However, this accomplishes nothing. Instead of comparing yourself to others, embrace your own looks.
Learn to recognize your own beauty, and let the good aspects of your looks and style make you feel more confident.

5. Find a gay community that embraces your beauty. 

There is no one way to be a beautiful and attractive gay man. Some gay men find skinny, hairless men beautiful. Other gay men prefer hairy, large men. In other words, if you want to feel beautiful you don't necessarily need to change yourself. Instead, you can surround yourself with people who like you as you are!
It is undeniable that it feels good when someone else thinks you are beautiful. If you are around people that fill you with self doubt and self hatred, those people are toxic. Find other people that can see the beauty that already exists in you.

While many countries hotly debate the issue of same-sex marriage, it has been 15 years since its legalisation in the Netherlands. More than twenty countries* have followed the Dutch example.

Here, euronews takes a look back on the step-by-step process that made the Netherlands the first country in the world to introduce gay marriage, and what the situation is today.

A step-by-step process

Traditionally, Dutch society is organised around ‘pillars’, one for each group of society (Protestants, Catholics, liberals, social-democrats). Each pillar had its political party, its unions, education system and hospitals. It was “the Catholic psychiatric hospitals, facing a great number of severely depressed homosexual patients, who started to raise their voices against discrimination” explains Laurent Chambon, a French sociologist living in Amsterdam, by phone to euronews.

For Chambon, this progressive position taken by Dutch Catholics differs from the official Catholic Church view on the matter, because of the Catholics’ minority status in the Netherlands. “They are a minority and thus tend to be more progressive, similarly to the Jewish minority.”

Under the fleeting light of an autumn half-moon, an Italian medical student made his way to the top of a modern high-rise in east Rome, not far from an ancient arch built by the emperor Claudius.

From the 11th floor of the apartment block, which once housed a pasta factory, the 21-year-old could probably just discern the darkened outline of the Colosseum about a mile away. It may have been the last thing he saw.

"I'm gay," the student, identified only as Simone D., said in a note discovered after he jumped to his death. "Italy is a free country. But there are homophobes, and those like that must search their consciences."

His suicide in the early hours of Oct. 27 brought sorrow to this city, but also a tragic sense of familiarity. It was at least the third death in Rome within 12 months of a young person who had decided to end his life out of despair over being gay or over the harassment he had endured. Two months earlier, a 14-year-old boy leaped from his balcony; before that, a 15-year-old hanged himself.

For almost half a century, Georg and Dietmar have been a happy couple. But Georg knows that other gay people their age weren’t so lucky and that lives were destroyed by laws and by being ostracized by society. This is why he has committed himself to fighting for justice, with a mix of youthful energy and old-age wisdom.

65-year-old Georg smiles at me with young eyes, as I talk to him about his long-term relationship with Dietmar and ask him to give our readers some advice for a successful partnership. He feels he isn’t able to do so “since every relationship is very different and everybody has to figure out for themselves what works. You know, sometimes we ourselves are still blown away by the fact that we’ve been together for almost 44 years, and especially by how time has flown.”

He’s also happy to share that they’ve been in an open relationship for a few years now, which has been very fulfilling for both of them. However, that’s not what defines the relationship: “Our loving relationship goes way beyond sexuality,” Georg states, and Dietmar agrees.

The one vital thing is that they have so much in common after all these years. Their shared memories and experiences are continually deepening.

If you have been through people bullying you because of your sexual orientation, it can be very discouraging. These are some steps to help you deal with the bullying.

1. Explain it to them. 

Sometimes the bullying is because the person isn't properly informed about your sexuality. Explaining it could help them to understand you are the way you are, and that you can't help it.
Older people who grew up in a homophobic environment may have been raised to believe that being gay is wrong. People like your grandma may be like this. Just try to either explain it to them, or just tell them the bare minimum, and they should understand.

2. Don't react! 

Most of the time it is because they want to get a reaction from you. Just walk past and ignore them. Even if they don't go away you aren't provoking them to do anything worse.

3. Sometimes people are homophobic because of their religion. 

If this is the case, try to explain to them that you are different because you were born that way, and that it is not your fault.

Last spring the rights of same-sex couples gained recognition in a number of places throughout the world. In the United States, three states—Delaware, Minnesota, and Rhode Island—legalized same-sex marriage, while supreme courts in two heavyweights on the international scene, Brazil and Germany, struck down statutes discriminating against homosexuals in the name of equality under the law. All these places have quite different social structures and legal systems, yet gay marriage did not stir much controversy in any of them.

But it was different in France—and for regrettable reasons. To be sure, on May 18 President François Hollande did sign a law stipulating that “marriage is a contract between two persons who are either of the same sex or of a different sex.” Eleven days later, Hélène Mandroux, the mayor of Montpellier, was the first public official to wed a homosexual couple.

But what fears and turmoil the debate aroused! On May 21 the right-wing historian Dominique Venner (a former member of the OAS, the clandestine organization created to kill Charles de Gaulle in order avenge the loss of Algeria) committed suicide on the altar of the Cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris. Venner wanted, he said, to “awaken consciences” and stir them against “the erosion of European civilization.” Other opponents of the law summoned a long list of natural right and counterrevolutionary thinkers, from Thomas Aquinas to Joseph de Maistre.

Daily Dos and Don'ts for Ulcerative Colitis

When you experience an ulcerative colitis flare, it's easy to assign blame, be it on last night's spicy dinner or on that extra-large coffee. In actuality, flares are unpredictable — there are no proven triggers or foolproof ways to prevent them.

The most important thing to do if you have ulcerative colitis? "Take your medications as prescribed and work closely with your doctor to stay well," says Richard Bloomfeld, MD, a gastroenterologist and associate professor at the Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center in Winston-Salem, N.C.

However, when you're experiencing active ulcerative colitis symptoms, certain bad habits can make you feel worse or keep you from reaching remission. Avoiding these common mistakes is an important part of ulcerative colitis management.

Mistake No. 1: Skipping Medications

A variety of medications are used to treat ulcerative colitis, depending on the severity of your condition and your overall health. But it doesn't matter whether your doctor has you taking an anti-inflammatory drug, an immunosuppressant, or a combination of medications — none of them will work if you don't take them as your doctor prescribes.

Since their December arrival in Vietnam, U.S. Ambassador Ted Osius and his husband have become the most prominent gay couple in the Southeast Asian country.

Osius and Clayton Bond landed with their toddler son shortly before the government abolished its ban on same-sex marriage. Now the couple, who recently adopted an infant girl, find themselves ambassadors of the nascent LGBT rights movement spreading across the country.

“A lot of young people have reached out to me on Facebook, to say: ‘We are happy to see somebody who is gay and is happy in his personal life but also has had professional success’,” Osius said in an interview. “I don’t think of it as advocating as much as supporting Vietnamese civil society in doing what it is already doing.”

Do People Need Less Sleep As They Age?

We all look forward to a good night's sleep. Sleep allows our body to rest and to restore its energy levels. Without enough restful sleep, not only can we become grumpy and irritable, but also inattentive and more prone to accidents. Like food and water, adequate sleep is essential to good health and quality of life.

There are two types of sleep: non-rapid eye movement -- or NREM sleep -- and rapid eye movement -- or REM sleep. NREM sleep includes four stages, ranging from light to deep sleep. We cycle through these four stages of sleep approximately every 90 minutes. Then we go into REM sleep, the most active stage of sleep when dreaming often occurs. During REM sleep, the eyes move back and forth beneath the eyelids and muscles become immobile.

Researchers believe that two body systems -- the sleep-wake process and our circadian biologic clock -- regulate our sleep. They program our bodies to feel sleepy at night and awake during the day.

In a bid to defend what they deem traditional values, lawmakers in Russia next week will consider the country's most aggressive anti-gay legislation in recent memory: a ban on public displays of affection among gays that could punish couples for kissing or even holding hands on the street with a fine or a two-week jail sentence.

The bill, which is slated for discussion in Russia's parliament next Friday, would be the latest salvo against "nontraditional sexual relations," which President Vladimir Putin and other senior officials have singled out as a corrupting influence on Russian morals and a symbol of the West's permissiveness.

In 2013, Russia passed a controversial law that banned "gay propaganda," public speech or demonstrations equating gay lifestyles to straight ones, saying it may influence children. The new legislation goes further, allowing a fine of up to 5,000 rubles, or $65, for the "public expression of nontraditional sexual relations, resulting in the public demonstration of one's own distorted sexual preferences in public places." If the act takes place in a school or other place where children congregate, the punishment may include 15 days in jail.

The Ontario government recently mandated that Catholic schools allow students to start Gay Straight Alliance (GSA) clubs, allegedly, to protect kids from bullying. Said the premier of Ontario, Dalton McGuinty: “There are values that transcend any one faith. … And if you talk to parents, they’ll tell you. They want their kids to be respected and accepted.”

Of course, I reject his very deliberate verbiage. The notion of respect doesn’t “transcend” the cross any more than the “religion” of secularism transcends Christianity. But on with the topic at hand: while the premier appeals to principles the Catholic Church and gay advocacy groups all agree on, like safety and respect for our kids, he conveniently leaves out the rest.

The Catholic Church and groups like GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network), which provides the support to the 4,000-plus GSA’s across North America have a radically different sexual ethic, and thus, a radically different pastoral strategy for raising teens with same-sex attraction. An honest look at those differences shows that the Canadian government is rolling a Trojan horse into Catholic schools under the guise of “anti-bullying.”

Toronto’s Cardinal, Thomas Collins expressed his concern: “Because this model is so closely related to a movement with particular views concerning the human person and the issues of life, people who disagree with those views are understandably concerned that the model can serve as a means not only to address bullying, but to promote the views with which they disagree.”

The “particular views” of the movement that don’t square with Catholicism include a rejection of the notion that homosexual activity is any less natural or normal than heterosexual activity—in other words, a rejection of Judeo-Christian- and natural-law-based thinking about sexual ethics. GLSEN labels such thinking “heterosexism.”

There is a clear push for people with same-sex attraction to identify themselves as “gay,” and thus, inherently different than everyone else. GSA’s commend kids for “coming out of the closet” and letting everyone know what their attractions are, so that their identity is further solidified.

Finally, for most (if not all) gay advocacy groups, it goes without saying that gays should be open to romantic relationships with people of the same sex, and that depriving them of that would be depriving them of love.

And while they may or may not overtly promote sexual activity, GSA’s encourage teens to talk about their sexual “identity” and attractions without any expectation that abstinence be promoted or even discussed. If we think that doesn’t send a clear message to the average teen, we’re kidding ourselves.

The Catholic approach is obviously very different. As far as “sexual identity” is concerned, Blessed Mother Teresa, who started New York’s first AIDS hospice, sums up the Church’s approach. She refused to call people “homosexual,” instead she insisted they be called “friends of Jesus.” In the words of the Ontario Conference of Catholic Bishops, “the orientation of an act is homosexual or heterosexual but the person is not.” A person simply cannot be reduced to or defined by a sexual attraction.

They spent a month traveling in Vietnam in April and May of 2015 and found it to be open-minded and gay-friendly country. We never once had problems booking double rooms and locals were never once bemused by us.

There’s an active gay scene in Saigon and in Hanoi where there has been a Pride parade since 2012. The Viet Pride 2015 is due to take place from July 31 to August 2. More up to date information about it can be found on their official website or their Facebook page.

We met a very sweet and confident local gay man Quan in Saigon, who traveled with us and gave us his perspective on gay Vietnam and coming out.