All the game advice out there can get confusing, and we can easily lose sight of what’s most important. So we want to give you 19 fundamental tips to be a sexy man to women and gay men.
1. Be Relaxed And Chill
The best state for meeting women is actually a chilled out, relaxed state, and not a hyper state where you’re bouncing off the walls super excited or freaking out.
The best state for meeting women isn’t extravagant. It’s just relaxed and chill. Because talking to a girl being all relaxed and chill communicates to her that you’re not desperate to please her or kiss her butt or get her approval. It shows her that you’re normal and confident.
And the best way to be relaxed and chill is to draw your state from within. You’re positive and relaxed from within no matter what’s going around you or what the girls are doing. So if a girl gives you a positive response, you just remain relaxed and chill, just as if she were to give you a negative response. You remain unreactive to the ups and downs in the environment. You’re steady like a rock. And that’s what women want to find in a man.
3. Don’t Apologize For Your Actions
Don’t apologize for your actions. When you go up to a girl, or you grab her hand, or you give her a hug, or you give her a compliment, or whatever it is, follow through with your actions and don’t apologize for your actions.
Being unapologetic is the key to getting away with any move, and to get the girl reacting to you.
4. Speak Loudly!
Speak Loudly! The loudest guy in the group is typically the guy who has the most social value, who is the leader, who is looked to for leadership, who is the most comfortable guy in a social situation, who is the most confident guy. Because if you’re not confident, you won’t be talking, let alone talking very loudly. Loudness is a cue for confidence, and girls love it.
7. You Like Silences
Be comfortable with silences. Normal conversations will have silences. If you feel like you have to keep talking non-stop to avoid any silences, or to cover up any silences, the girl will notice that and it comes across as nervous and frantic. Silences in fact are a good way to create sexual tension, by talking slowly and making eye contact during the silence, that’s where sexual tension can be created.
10. Physically Escalate
Physically escalate! You can be the best conversationalist in the world, by funny, be interesting… but that only makes you “cute”, it doesn’t make you sex worthy attractive to women. Women get sexually attracted and wet between their legs when you Touch them. So you need a touch escalation sequence, like hugging the girl, taking her hands, spinning her, whispering into her ear, etc.
11. Let Her Game You Back!
If you’re just gaming on the gaming, gaming on the girl, but the girl doesn’t game you, you’re not going to have sex with her!
You’ve got to get the girl to chase after you at least part of the time. And you get the girl gaming you in the bonding and rapport stage where you transition into a 50/50 give and take talking ratio. This is where you can ask her questions about herself and you’re getting to know the real girl. And she’ll ask questions about you, and that in itself is a basic form of the girl gaming you.
Of using push pull physically to push her away, and allow her to step back into the space to touch you back.
And the more she finds herself gaming you, the more she’ll find herself liking you and you’re that much closer to her sleeping with you.
12. Be Authentic
Make your conversations real and authentic. A topic I’ve been covering quite a bit in past lessons. Basically speak about whatever YOU want to speak about it so it seems real and authentic and you’re not trying to kiss the girl’s ass or trying to impress her and you’re not going inside your head for “the right thing to say”. And besides, the more real you are, the more balls that takes and the girl likes it, it tells her that you talk to beautiful girls all the time and you’re not freaked out by it.
13. She Feels What You Feel
Whatever you feel, the girl is going to feel. She’s not judging you so much on your looks, or your words, or your status symbols, but how you are feeling beneath all that. Because if you feel like shit, she’ll feel you are low status.
So it’s best to be feeling good. And to feel good, you can do a number of things. Hit the gym, eat nutritious vegetables and fruits instead of sugar snacks, get enough sleep, and be a man that takes action, daring action.
And be a fun guy to be around. Smile, laugh, don’t take things too seriously. And that positivity will radiate from within you. And once the girls sees that you’re not looking to her to make you happy, but that you have a neverending well of self-generated positivity, she’ll be extremely attracted to that and your positivity will be infectious.
Don’t be judgmental of women. If you assume she’s a bitch, or she’s a slut, or she’s a caricature picture of a feminist, it’s going to make you think negatively, and will ruin your game. Instead by open minded and be a source of positivity, and that’s what will attract women to you because girls want to be around a cool guy, a cool guy being a guy who is non-judgmental and positive.
15. Persist!
Persist! Pass a woman’s congruence tests. Every time a girl tries to ignore you or blow you out or not make eye contact, and you ignore her initial unreceptiveness like it didn’t happen, her attraction for you goes UP for you. That’s because women want to see if you’ll slink away with your tail between your legs, or if you can hold your own frame of positivity and pull them into it.
16. Embrace The Unknown
You don’t want to try to micromanage everything in interactions. If the girl sees you going inside your head too much to try to figure out what to do all the time, or sees you second guessing yourself and calculating game, she’ll see that as not cool. Instead, you want to be present, in the moment, and trusting that all of your actions are the right actions.
17. Assume Attraction!
Assume attraction! This is where your perception of yourself and perception of the interaction tends to become reality. If you assume you suck, you’re going to go into the interaction being needy and unworthy and nervous, and you’ll get a sucky result. But if you just assume the girl is massively attracted to you, and assume that you’re the most attractive guy in the world, the girl will sense that confidence and certainty and drive in you and be massively attracted. It will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Assuming attraction, creates attraction!
18. Stand Out!
Do you stand out from the crowd visually? Do you workout and exercise and keep fit? Are you wearing cool clothes? Or are you dressed exactly like everyone else, trying your best to fit in to the crowd and be just another guy in jeans, flip flops, and a ragged T shirt?
1. Be Relaxed And Chill
The best state for meeting women is actually a chilled out, relaxed state, and not a hyper state where you’re bouncing off the walls super excited or freaking out.
The best state for meeting women isn’t extravagant. It’s just relaxed and chill. Because talking to a girl being all relaxed and chill communicates to her that you’re not desperate to please her or kiss her butt or get her approval. It shows her that you’re normal and confident.
And the best way to be relaxed and chill is to draw your state from within. You’re positive and relaxed from within no matter what’s going around you or what the girls are doing. So if a girl gives you a positive response, you just remain relaxed and chill, just as if she were to give you a negative response. You remain unreactive to the ups and downs in the environment. You’re steady like a rock. And that’s what women want to find in a man.
2. Demonstrate Sexual Intent
You want to convey sexual intent to the girl. When you just pretend to play aloof, or you completely hide your sexual interest from the girl, she’ll just assume that you’re not a sexual guy or you’re not interested in her sexually, or you’re just a nice guy. By hiding your sexual interest, it ensures that you’ll be liked, but it doesn’t create any sparks of attraction in the girl.
Instead, you want to convey sexual intent to the girl by showing her in some way, that you have sexual interest in her, that you see her as a sexual woman. Like you can be talking to her normally, but you massage her back. Or you throw up a compliment in the very beginning. Or you hold eye contact and talk slow and sexy. Something that conveys sexual interest and intent.
And that tells the woman that you’re confident enough to go after her. And that’s what a woman wants to see in a man, confidence to go for what he wants.
You want to convey sexual intent to the girl. When you just pretend to play aloof, or you completely hide your sexual interest from the girl, she’ll just assume that you’re not a sexual guy or you’re not interested in her sexually, or you’re just a nice guy. By hiding your sexual interest, it ensures that you’ll be liked, but it doesn’t create any sparks of attraction in the girl.
Instead, you want to convey sexual intent to the girl by showing her in some way, that you have sexual interest in her, that you see her as a sexual woman. Like you can be talking to her normally, but you massage her back. Or you throw up a compliment in the very beginning. Or you hold eye contact and talk slow and sexy. Something that conveys sexual interest and intent.
And that tells the woman that you’re confident enough to go after her. And that’s what a woman wants to see in a man, confidence to go for what he wants.
3. Don’t Apologize For Your Actions
Don’t apologize for your actions. When you go up to a girl, or you grab her hand, or you give her a hug, or you give her a compliment, or whatever it is, follow through with your actions and don’t apologize for your actions.
Being unapologetic is the key to getting away with any move, and to get the girl reacting to you.
4. Speak Loudly!
Speak Loudly! The loudest guy in the group is typically the guy who has the most social value, who is the leader, who is looked to for leadership, who is the most comfortable guy in a social situation, who is the most confident guy. Because if you’re not confident, you won’t be talking, let alone talking very loudly. Loudness is a cue for confidence, and girls love it.
5. It’s Okay To Lose
You’re not going to win every time and you’ve got to be cool that. But the times you don’t win, you’ll learn.
If you’re out there taking action, taking responsibility to go out, learning and achieving things, you’ll progress. You won’t win every time, but you’ll achieve. And when you learn and you win and you go, you feel good about yourself, you feel congruent with being a man of action.
Because the worst thing you can do is do nothing with your time and just watch TV or play videogames. Because the time will pass and your opportunities will be lost.
6. Draw Your state From Within
Go out for yourself. And draw your happiness from within yourself. Don’t look to women to make you happy. If you need girls on any level to make you happy or feed your ego, that’s going to create approach anxiety. Because you have an outcome in mind that you need the girls approval to make you feel good. And that’s where you get nervous.
So instead, draw your state within, let go of the outcomes, and your approach anxiety will melt away and you’ll feel happier and more fulfilled.
You’re not going to win every time and you’ve got to be cool that. But the times you don’t win, you’ll learn.
If you’re out there taking action, taking responsibility to go out, learning and achieving things, you’ll progress. You won’t win every time, but you’ll achieve. And when you learn and you win and you go, you feel good about yourself, you feel congruent with being a man of action.
Because the worst thing you can do is do nothing with your time and just watch TV or play videogames. Because the time will pass and your opportunities will be lost.
6. Draw Your state From Within
Go out for yourself. And draw your happiness from within yourself. Don’t look to women to make you happy. If you need girls on any level to make you happy or feed your ego, that’s going to create approach anxiety. Because you have an outcome in mind that you need the girls approval to make you feel good. And that’s where you get nervous.
So instead, draw your state within, let go of the outcomes, and your approach anxiety will melt away and you’ll feel happier and more fulfilled.
7. You Like Silences
Be comfortable with silences. Normal conversations will have silences. If you feel like you have to keep talking non-stop to avoid any silences, or to cover up any silences, the girl will notice that and it comes across as nervous and frantic. Silences in fact are a good way to create sexual tension, by talking slowly and making eye contact during the silence, that’s where sexual tension can be created.
8. Meet Her Face-to-Face
Approach the girl face to face. You want to put yourself out there on the line, face to face, vulnerable, facing up to the social pressure, that’s what makes you attractive. Forget the talking to the girl over your shoulder and other complicated techniques, just approach the girl normally, face to face, that’s the most attractive way to approach.
Approach the girl face to face. You want to put yourself out there on the line, face to face, vulnerable, facing up to the social pressure, that’s what makes you attractive. Forget the talking to the girl over your shoulder and other complicated techniques, just approach the girl normally, face to face, that’s the most attractive way to approach.
9. Don’t Be “Perfect”
Being natural and making “mistakes” is attractive to the girl. Because if you were to run “perfect game” and say everything “perfectly”, it would make you look plastic to the girl, and as if you were running a big routine. You don’t want to come across as too seamless and too perfect.
You want to make a lot of mistakes, big mistakes, because that’s what makes you cute to the girl, and seem really real and genuine. It’s that naturalness and making mistakes that makes you attractive. Like being Indiana Jones, he makes a bunch of mistakes and bumbles around, but that’s what makes him likable.
So don’t be afraid of making lots of mistakes in interactions, consider the mistakes part of the routine of what makes you cute to the girl.
Being natural and making “mistakes” is attractive to the girl. Because if you were to run “perfect game” and say everything “perfectly”, it would make you look plastic to the girl, and as if you were running a big routine. You don’t want to come across as too seamless and too perfect.
You want to make a lot of mistakes, big mistakes, because that’s what makes you cute to the girl, and seem really real and genuine. It’s that naturalness and making mistakes that makes you attractive. Like being Indiana Jones, he makes a bunch of mistakes and bumbles around, but that’s what makes him likable.
So don’t be afraid of making lots of mistakes in interactions, consider the mistakes part of the routine of what makes you cute to the girl.
10. Physically Escalate
Physically escalate! You can be the best conversationalist in the world, by funny, be interesting… but that only makes you “cute”, it doesn’t make you sex worthy attractive to women. Women get sexually attracted and wet between their legs when you Touch them. So you need a touch escalation sequence, like hugging the girl, taking her hands, spinning her, whispering into her ear, etc.
11. Let Her Game You Back!
If you’re just gaming on the gaming, gaming on the girl, but the girl doesn’t game you, you’re not going to have sex with her!
You’ve got to get the girl to chase after you at least part of the time. And you get the girl gaming you in the bonding and rapport stage where you transition into a 50/50 give and take talking ratio. This is where you can ask her questions about herself and you’re getting to know the real girl. And she’ll ask questions about you, and that in itself is a basic form of the girl gaming you.
Of using push pull physically to push her away, and allow her to step back into the space to touch you back.
And the more she finds herself gaming you, the more she’ll find herself liking you and you’re that much closer to her sleeping with you.
12. Be Authentic
Make your conversations real and authentic. A topic I’ve been covering quite a bit in past lessons. Basically speak about whatever YOU want to speak about it so it seems real and authentic and you’re not trying to kiss the girl’s ass or trying to impress her and you’re not going inside your head for “the right thing to say”. And besides, the more real you are, the more balls that takes and the girl likes it, it tells her that you talk to beautiful girls all the time and you’re not freaked out by it.
13. She Feels What You Feel
Whatever you feel, the girl is going to feel. She’s not judging you so much on your looks, or your words, or your status symbols, but how you are feeling beneath all that. Because if you feel like shit, she’ll feel you are low status.
So it’s best to be feeling good. And to feel good, you can do a number of things. Hit the gym, eat nutritious vegetables and fruits instead of sugar snacks, get enough sleep, and be a man that takes action, daring action.
And be a fun guy to be around. Smile, laugh, don’t take things too seriously. And that positivity will radiate from within you. And once the girls sees that you’re not looking to her to make you happy, but that you have a neverending well of self-generated positivity, she’ll be extremely attracted to that and your positivity will be infectious.
14. Don’t Judge Her
Don’t be judgmental of women. If you assume she’s a bitch, or she’s a slut, or she’s a caricature picture of a feminist, it’s going to make you think negatively, and will ruin your game. Instead by open minded and be a source of positivity, and that’s what will attract women to you because girls want to be around a cool guy, a cool guy being a guy who is non-judgmental and positive.
15. Persist!
Persist! Pass a woman’s congruence tests. Every time a girl tries to ignore you or blow you out or not make eye contact, and you ignore her initial unreceptiveness like it didn’t happen, her attraction for you goes UP for you. That’s because women want to see if you’ll slink away with your tail between your legs, or if you can hold your own frame of positivity and pull them into it.
16. Embrace The Unknown
You don’t want to try to micromanage everything in interactions. If the girl sees you going inside your head too much to try to figure out what to do all the time, or sees you second guessing yourself and calculating game, she’ll see that as not cool. Instead, you want to be present, in the moment, and trusting that all of your actions are the right actions.
17. Assume Attraction!
Assume attraction! This is where your perception of yourself and perception of the interaction tends to become reality. If you assume you suck, you’re going to go into the interaction being needy and unworthy and nervous, and you’ll get a sucky result. But if you just assume the girl is massively attracted to you, and assume that you’re the most attractive guy in the world, the girl will sense that confidence and certainty and drive in you and be massively attracted. It will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Assuming attraction, creates attraction!
18. Stand Out!
Do you stand out from the crowd visually? Do you workout and exercise and keep fit? Are you wearing cool clothes? Or are you dressed exactly like everyone else, trying your best to fit in to the crowd and be just another guy in jeans, flip flops, and a ragged T shirt?
19. Hold Eye Contact
Make eye contact and hold it. Don’t dart your eyes around, don’t keep breaking eye contact with her. It’s when you hold eye contact, especially through pauses and silences, that you create sexual tension and butterflies in the woman’s stomach!
Make eye contact and hold it. Don’t dart your eyes around, don’t keep breaking eye contact with her. It’s when you hold eye contact, especially through pauses and silences, that you create sexual tension and butterflies in the woman’s stomach!
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